...feeling a bit sorry for meself again, it must be said. But I think I'm past it now, + thank jeeesus for that. I bore myself silly when I'm low, so hate to think how bored everyone else must be. This week saw a lot of unnecessary napping, chocolate eating + general grouchiness. I tried to balance it with Being Good To Myself stuff - long walks at the beach, plenty of vegies, Mewi's rescue remedy (go the placebo!) - but have accepted that sometimes I just need to wallow. It has to be done even if it doesn't necessarily achieve anything, no matter how good the Reasons To Wallow are. Maybe, at very best, it achieves a little balancing out of personality + renewed realisation that I prefer myself/my life/my experience of the world when I'm positive.
And there was still plenty to make me smile. Largely the people around me who I love + feel blessed by. (I posted some of this week's email banter because it demonstrates how little it takes to make me smile... a mere thimbleful of friendship, care, silliness.) A great dance class today where I got to literally shake off some of my blues. Having dinner snatched out of my hand by a cheeky seagull on Tuesday night. (Nature has a sense of humour and no respect for any of us!) Getting an invite round to Shady's + cementing a new friendship with someone gorgeous. Making the choice to stay home on a Saturday night - it might make me a geek but it's what I need + I'm getting better at recognising my needs. Manu. Margarita therapy with the work gang last night.
On that note, I'm posting the photo in spite of myself. I do hate it Bez, but I've been documenting you all week, looking silly for your conference presentation, so the least I can do is reciprocate. Next time we need to work harder on styling the Claire Looking Like An Idiot shot, so that I at least look like an idiot without a goofy hunchback and such prominent tuckshop-lady-arms. Ooops... I guess that's just what I actually look like... learning to live with it... still. Please note that I spilt the margarita prior to drinking any + only sucked it up off the table because everyone was egging me on (plus the fact that it was probably worth five bucks). It was that kinda week. New lows all round.
4 comments:
don't mind the tuckshop lady arms. mine made the mercury but enhanced by zoom lens so i relived that arnie-arm neil cairns dream that scared the shit out of me. i realised after those work snaps of gut making its presence felt that i care less what others think of my appearance. me and doggies are what matter. better to laugh than cry. and, perhaps less fortunately, i am being less restrictive of the socially unacceptable irreverence of my natural self, and caring less about it. i hope this makes you feel normal and, thus, happy. i like to think that fight club might also have had some good effect on you.
It was goofy-esque hunchback that really alarmed me. Have been sitting straighter since, though I know my posture is shit. All us computer-slaves will become gnarled old gimps in time. We are no longer in league with nature.
Fight Club definitely had good effect, as did your words of wisdom, as did the glimpse of your gut. It must be mentioned that yours is considerably smaller than mine, but I'm glad you feel liberated by it.
i never thought i may become a gimp. a totally new concept!! better get my wardrobe ready
I think there will be some straightforward means of inserting panels into existing clothing to allow room for new bumps and hunches. In fact, if we get our entrepreneurial minds onto it now we might make a motza.
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